It’s been revealed that the owner/occupier of Buckingham Palace, London SW 1V, has seen her bank account plummet from £320 million to a mere £270 million, mainly due to her investment portfolio losing 30% of its value. I’m not sure how she’s going to cope, what with having all those utility bills to pay for, MOTs for Prince Philip’s carriage driving vehicles, and of course, keeping the corgis in the style to which they’ve become accustomed. Maybe she could lease out some of the 52 bedrooms to the hordes who congregate there every day. Failing that, charging £1 to use one of the 78 bathrooms would bring in some much needed pocket money.
I see that a chairperson has been appointed to an independent group to examine the future of bull hire programmes in crofting areas. This group announced a couple of days ago that they were to hold a meeting to see what kind of bulls were most suitable for the crofters. I think it would be a better idea if they were to decide what kind was most suitable for the cows, and I would suggest that they start by deciding that it should definitely be male.
I’ve always been aware of the fact that ants were excellent workers, but I didn’t know until this week that they could carry up to twenty times their own body weight, and move together to move heavier objects. However, it also came to my attention that the South American giant anteater consumes more than 30,000 ants a day, or 210,000 a week. Although the anteaters’ numbers are estimated to have gone down to about 5,000, that’s still a lot of ants that aren’t going to reach pension age.
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