Apres Hospital Rantings

There’s been 8 weeks since I’ve written anything on this blog, mainly due to the fact that I’m spending a lot of time in hospital, and the rest of it in relatives’ homes, so as to afford me some rest while I have my 2 weeks’ respite. Everyone has been great to me over the past while, both while I’ve cooled down at my relations’ pads, and while I’m getting treatment in the hospital, usually over 5 days at a time. The care lavished on myself and the other patients is second to none, from consultants, doctors, nurses, and all the other folk needed to provide auxiliary services. There’s a feeling of camaraderie between staff and patients, something like an unspoken feeling that by everyone pulling together, each patient is going to wipe the floor with his or her disease. I was rather wary when I had to go in on 1st June for the first time, in order to undergo an operation, but 14 weeks on, and it just seems like a few days. Although I’d like for now to thank all those who have helped me over the past while, I’ll keep their champagne on ice until I walk out of there, knowing that together, we’ve triumphed!

I had a brief look at a couple of newspapers this morning, and see that George Galloway, he once of the Labour Party, then the left wing Respect Party (what a misnomer!) is still getting quite a few extra pounds into his over sized wallet by writing for the Daily Record. With his usual humility, he praises himself for having refused £200,000 to appear in the “Ultimate Big Brother” house. Maybe the milk in the cat’s dish was not to his liking the last time. I was actually more interested in a smaller article that he penned, bemoaning the fact that there are so many presenters etc from the Highlands and Islands on BBC Scotland radio and TV. It doesn’t seem to have crossed his mind that maybe they are there because they can actually do their job. I am fiercely proud of my roots in the north of Scotland, and I find his remarks very offensive, especially when he remarks that maybe BBC Scotland should relocate to Stornaway (he didn’t even bother to check his spelling –should he be classed as a journalist?), as some of the staff must be homesick. Over 2 World Wars, the Highlands and Islands have had the biggest percentage of folk serving for their country than anywhere else in the UK – they didn’t have time to get homesick then, and they certainly don’t feel homesick nowadays, after having travelled just a few miles down the road. Of course, the overfed George has quite a few places to be homesick for, such as Iraq, Palestine, and Afghanistan.

While sitting out in the glorious sunshine earlier on in the afternoon, my mind wandered somewhat, remembering odd things like gaffes that had been included in CVs, such as not using punctuation correctly, hence some classics like “I am interested in cooking dogs and interesting people.” It also reminded me of some press clippings that I’d stored in a folder some time ago, so I thought it was time to unearth a couple of them --
Concerning a sign seen in a Police canteen in Christchurch, New Zealand:
“Will the person who took a slice of cake from the Commissioner's Office return it immediately. It is needed as evidence in a poisoning case.”
From The Derby Abbey Community News:
“We apologize for the error in the last edition, in which we stated that 'Mr Fred Nicolme is a Defective in the Police Force'. This was a typographical error. We meant of course that Mr Nicolme is a Detective in the Police Farce.”
Norway
Norwegian business consultant Hendrik Pedersen worked for 13 years on a book about Norwegian economic solutions. He took the 250-page manuscript to be copied, only to have it reduced to 50,000 strips of paper in seconds when a worker confused the copier with the shredder. Time to make a quick exit, I think, in case I lose everything as well.