Global Warming or Freezing?

Another really cold day here in the northern part of Scotland, with a strong wind, frost, and choppy seas, meaning that ferries are stuck in port, thus leaving supermarket shelves so bare that they could easily be eligible to be on the Sun’s Page Three. I think that human hibernation for the next month is the only answer. In fact, although I might have mentioned this before, the wind was so strong that it reminded me of a similar day a while back, when a neighbour told me that he’s watched one of his hens lay the same egg three times.

A few weeks ago, we had some of the world’s so-called leaders having a chinwag for 10 days on how to stop global warming. They couldn’t agree on anything, of course, although they DID manage to spend millions on expenses, quaffing the best food and drink, and managing to leave even more of a carbon footprint by jetting in for their conference from all corners of the globe. Have they never heard of some advances that have been made in technology over the years, such as video conferencing? Going by the weather we’re having now, can we expect them to have another shindig soon, in order to discuss how to stop global freezing?

Still on the weather front – David McLetchie, leader of the Scottish Tories between 1999 and 2005, has suggested that offenders should be made to clear our pavements and streets of snow as part of their rehab. Within minutes, a listener had phoned BBC Scotland, asking how the public could manage their finances if the bankers were out, busy shovelling the white stuff.

I see that Stephanie Beacham, she of Dynasty fame, managed to burn herself just days before she was due to go into the Celebrity Big Brother house, whatever that is. She knocked over a saucepan of boiling water in her kitchen, and somehow managed to scald one of her legs and her head. She must be either very supple or else rather small in stature to have managed that feat.

A quick update on Mrs Ure, who is still stuck in a caravan with one of her friends, and of course, with the turkey. I thought things couldn’t get any worse, but it seems that they have, as the electricity generator back home has blown up, and her husband has to rely on candles and a coal fire. Maybe the song, “The Twelve Days of Christmas” will need to have a few extra days added to it.