Saturday 17 January 2009

Useless and Costly Surveys

A recent survey found that as much as 6% of the world’s population may experience sleep paralysis, the inability to move and speak for several minutes after awakening. I think maybe that quite a few of that 6% are probably MPs, senators etc. worldwide, the only difference being that some of them seem to experience the phenomenon 24/7. 


It seems that forty percent of American adults cannot fill out a bank deposit slip correctly. Now we know the real cause of this credit crunch. It couldn’t have been the dodgy fatcat bankers after all.

 

66% of men wear briefs, 22% wear boxers, and 6% prefer to toddle about without wearing any. From those results, I can only assume that the person who carried out the survey was not an accountant, or the missing 6% were admiring themselves in front of a mirror, sporting their wives’ smalls.

 

This one takes some beating. After careful research, it’s been discovered that most humans can guess someone’s sex with 95% accuracy just by smelling their breath. After all those years, now I know why doctors can confidently shout, “It’s a boy!” so soon after a birth takes place.

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